Who is the real me? The real me doesn't swear, caring, sweet, loving, helpful, blur and careless. All said by him. Cept for the first part...i dont think i'm wild...yet.

Only at times when i have the passion in something, especially music performances, only i can get wild. Wild to me is just whopping, screaming, and cheering extremely hard. That is equal to cheering for a football game, wouldn't it? I nods my head along with the music beat...doesnt that equal to shaking fists at football game?

After two weeks of stressing out, to near mental breakdown, i was finally getting a taste of how it feels like to release stress thru entertainment, thru laughing my heart out at anything and everything. Laughter is the best medicine they say. Do you know how strong the impact of this statement has on me? All the times i spent crying, the energy i've wasted i put it on my laughter. He wouldn't want me to cry always, doesnt he? He said it too. He even said...why am i so weak, can't i learn to be stronger.

Stronger. As i put aside my stressful assignments and not face the internet, and going out while thinking of him every now and then, not clinging onto him every sec and not demanding for him to come online at certain times...i'm learning to be stronger and independent when he's not here, giving him as much space as possible and when he wants to talk, i never hide my affections for him. I never hide my feelings for him for i believe in whenever you love someone, just say it, seize the moment when the feeling is very strong.

I love you...and believe me when i said i understanding in ur concern for me. I will know what to do and what not to do. I love you. Is there anyway..perhaps, to make this word bolder, bigger, stronger so that it can be imprinted deeply in his mind and yet at the same time, he doesnt take it for granted as merely relationship sustaining words? When it's actually a confession of loyalty, sincerity, and...committed love?

Aiya. Anyways i know i'm not pretentious. I KNOW IT okay. Okay? okay.